mixed

i can honestly say that this is the happiest i've ever been. i'm having the best days - gardening, eating, learning, being with friends and family, being home. but there are little sad intervals between when i'm processing the past - the loves lost, the loves leaving. i'm cleaning and organizing this house where my grandparents lived; where my grandparents won't return. the things of theirs i'm moving are replaced by mine, they're replaced by me. i'm living a life apart from what i've known these past 10 years and i've moved from the safety & solitude of that comfortable town. i'm happy to be here, but a little sad for what i'm leaving behind - the things you leave behind because abandon is essential if you want to go where the current is leading. relationships, lifestyles, jobs...sometimes changes come in waves. and i'm riding at the top of this one.
i know i'm where i need to be. i know this completely, 100%. but being where you need to be doesn't always equate with complete bliss. it sometimes includes loss, changing. and almost always includes growing. the past 8 months have been the most heartbreaking, exciting, scary and reassuring months i've lived. and there's so much further to go. we'll see what's next.

photos from my lovely weekend:

the tree in my front yard is blooming! let's hear a "hell yeah!" for spring approaching!

seeds are planted! tomatoes, peppers, lettuce, cilantro, basil, parsley, strawberries

coffee & friends

david taking suzanne's doggy for a spin on the mini dirt bike