vacation!

i just got back home from cancun! ok, it was actually a week ago now..but anyway....

  4 nights, 5 days, all inclusive vacation with the family. it was good! and somehow i managed to lose weight while there....i blame that on body-surfing the waves with my brothers pretty much every day. still finding new bruises & scrapes from the rocks and shell. i think almost all the sand is finally out of my hair, and its nice to sleep in my own bed again. but i do have to say that unlimited food & alcohol spoils you quite quickly.

so, here's a short documentation of my lovely stay...

BAHAHAHAHAAA jesse & i acting like idiots! it was fun!

david & suz

sunrise!

leaving

the morning after plan B

haha! that title just had to be used! the derby team we played last night was the B team for the national champs - Kansas City Roller Warriors. and yes, their B team was named "Plan B"

the night was crazy. i was knocked all over the floor, jammed a very ridiculous & tiring first jam, and went to the penalty box for the first time. we had some drama but our night ended having fun at the after party with our opposing team and dancing our fishnets off.

i hadn't realized until this past year how much i have been missing being on a team. from 9th grade through college i was with my track & cross country teams constantly. then i graduated college, got married, found a job & started my photography business. somewhere in the middle i started feeling that nostalgic ache. and then roller derby happened!

i have always had the most amazing friends ever. and they will always be there regardless of time, distance or situation. but i was delightfully surprised when when i joined roller derby and suddenly gained 10 or so new buddies that live in (or at least near) stillwater. and i can't imagine being without them now, all my 8-wheeled accomplices. i think we're all saving each other in little ways.

Mary Tyler Gore putting the jammer panty on Robin D'Cradle (yep, its called a panty)

before the bout, empty house. Robin, Gore, okc derby gal Rican Rage who joined us for the day & her man, and ref BOB

pivot panty and potato skins

Flogging Margot's awesome socks

i finally lettered my helmet

waiting.

my only significant bruise from the night. i have no idea what i did to my pinky but it went numb for a while.

*love*

the things you own...

we're moving this weekend. so now we're packing. and i might cry. 

whyyyyy do i have soooo much stuff!?!?!??  its amazing how much photography & design stuff i've collected in the past three years. i have boxes of paints, chain, cloth, backgrounds, paper of all sorts, a thousand types of glue & spray-paint, recycle/reuse projects. 

*breathe*

i'm quickly becoming detached to what i own. i probably should not watch Fight Club tonight or we will end up moving just our bed & toiletries. well plus my camera. but that would probably be it. and maybe it should be!

other than my photographic equipment, roller skates, bottle cap stuff & laptop there is really nothing else that i use on a weekly basis! why do i keep it? 

just in case. 

just in case one day i weigh what i used to weigh and i can wear those damn jeans again. 

just in case i get the crazy notion i can teach myself to paint again.

or the slim chance that i'll one day want to read my sappy high school journals and remember how boring i was. 

we've all heard it: the things you own end up owning you.

buried by belongings. its time to minimize.

i want to own only my freedom.

sanity

so i'm assuming that everyone is like me and has days where you wanna punch every female near you in the ovaries. and males....well, honestly on days like these they're so insignificant its not even worth thinking about. (except for my man cause he's amazing, thankyouverymuch)

for whatever reason you hate the world, your car, your pants, everyone who looks at you, laughs or even smiles in your direction. you can't stand to sit still and you just need something! (tell me its not just me and i need to be treated for bipolar!!!)

actually, i have a degree in psychology so i know i don't need to be treated for bipolar.

anyway...

i suppose the best thing for these days is to be armed with your remedy. a bad day remedy! maybe it doesn't work in every situation, but most of them! i know i've said it a hundred times, but mine is grass. not pot. (well. maybe...) its being outside!!!! trees, wind, grass, dirt, birds.

i left zumba before i glared any innocent booty-shakers to death and went for a run at the cross country course.

2 miles in my five fingers. some barefoot. stretch, breathe, calm.

then went home to get my camera, came back & took photos of the sun illuminating everything. 

i can breathe again.

so, what is your bad day remedy?

most of my photos are still on film because i'm amazing and didn't take extra batteries for my canon. but it didn' bother me....i was outside!

be afraid.

be VERY afraid.

(because i am! haha!)

i looove my new skates!

on a lighter note...

after work i went to the cross country course and ran 2 miles in my five fingers. AND, i seem to have found my favorite place in stillwater. i've been there a thousand times (literally, i'm sure). 

on the cross country course at the top of the big hill. next to the tree that coached had dubbed the big V (for victory.....whatever.) i stopped there to stretch and turned toward the west around 8:30.

just past sunset. and it was amazing.

the salmon sky, periwinkle clouds. all i could hear were birds and wind in the trees. the setting sun slowly turns all the greens to black. i can see the field, the horizon, the trees around me, the quiet apartments, the sky and nothing else. 

perfection.

i didn't want to leave. i could have curled up in that field to awake at sunrise completely surprised that i hadn't transformed into a flower through the night. (a weed is more realistic.) i'll have to go there more often.

on the down side, more blisters from breaking in the five fingers

spring cleaning

ahh *sigh* new blog space!
i dearly loved my funky green flowery background that reminded me of my grandmother's old kitchen chairs. it really did make my heart smile...but i needed a cleaner space.  and we all know spring is the perfect time for making that happen!
plus, i was in desperate need for more photo room on my posts. so, hopefully this doesn't look crazy on your monitor. give a shout if it does

=)

saturdays are for

sleeping in

morning zumba

morning sex

breakfast for lunch

(unless your preston and skip straight to lunch)

coffee & earl grey

photo shoots

 hanging with friends

watching movies back to back to back (on and on)

thrift store shopping

bike riding

kitty baths in the setting sun

taking ridiculous self portraits

staying up late

going to bed knowing that tomorrow is still the weekend!!

i hope everyone is enjoying their saturday!

photo therapy

   ggaaarrrrrr! so i thought this week would play out perfectly after such a good weekend. i mean, really all i gotta do is look forward to friday with high hopes and feel encouraged, right?  HA! well the high from the weekend bottomed out and its only tuesday.  
  now all the wonderful little weekend spoutings about enjoying life in the moment and learning to live with what you have (blah blah blah) crash right down on my furrowed brow.  "to hell with it!" i proclaim throughout the day (in my head, of course.)

(...well, ok, sometimes out loud too.)

  my contempt for my office job, the fact that all my pants this week are way tighter than they were last week, preston is working tonight and not with me, i always hate my photos and everyone else's always look amazing, i wish i were a better writer and i wish i could paint....agghhhhhh!

  the work day was finally over and as i got out of my car at home i saw them...tiny little birdie tracks. (yes, birdie.)  so i decided on photo therapy. its that one thing that almost always wipes that spoiled toddler expression off my face. i don't have to be around people or think about my stupid job or worry about what the cats are breaking in the next room...
its just me, the birds & the trees (since i'm usually drawn somewhere outside city limits on an old country road.)

of course, i forget that most country roads are dirt. but i turn down one anyway and of course immediately find something i just can't do without capturing. and so i ventured...

work pants hiked, poor taped fuji around my neck, and my (now muddy) sanuks.

 

it was pretty messy from alternating between mud & slush

but i was outside. i was delightfully cold. i was at home with myself, with the trees & snow.

now for some wine therapy.....