health nut, sweet teeth & fat tuesday

    i know most of you have heard me lecture the air about the evils of the american food system and how most people are blindly consuming these "edible" items we call food. i've gotten worse (actually, i suppose its better) about stabbing my pitchfork into the ground and sneering at the giant grocery stores for their beguiling prices and swearing to start a commune. i whole-heartedly desire to nourish myself from the earth and live a sustainable lifestyle...
    but why why whyyyyyyy do i have such a sweet tooth!? forget a sweet tooth...all my teeth are inclined toward sugar!!! (and its not even sugar we're consuming! most of it is high fructose corn crap which is waaay worse for you than actual sugar regardless of what those stupid hfcs lobbyist commercials will tell you!!! but that's another blog...) for such a "health nut," or whatever you wish to call it, i'm basically just a walking contradiction! i will eat cookies and cakes and drink dr. pepper and completely ignore what its doing to my body (let alone how its effecting the environment and the economy!)
    i do always feel guilty. and it really just sums up to laziness. i may have cravings, but i flicked them off my plate for years when i was running (most of the time.........ok, maybe about 65% of the time.) i suppose now that i don't have specific health or fitness goals i don't have a really good reason for being responsible. "really" here meaning something as important as money (scholarship at the time) or a fierce chewing out from someone. but my health? eh.....i always slough it off for tomorrow.
    so, now i'm here. weighing more than i've ever weighed and none of my clothes fit (the seems have actually ripped out of a pair of work pants i wear all the time!)  and before i get hateful comments about how small i am and how you hate me, just listen - its not about the weight!  its not about the roll that is currently hanging over my pants (not just sticking out above, but actually OVER) or the fact that i can't even wear my stretchy workout pants anymore. its the fact that these are all just very obvious warning signs that i am not taking care of myself.
    screw the weight. screw the roll. the extra boobs are nice so i'll leave that alone. but i need to stop eating crap! and then amy asked me today "are you giving anything up for lent?"

my reaction - "lent?"

i've never really given anything up for lent specifically but i figure now is the perfect time to break myself of some bad habits and replace them with good ones.

so here is my "suck it up and give it up" lent list:

 1. Dr. Pepper

 (i love/hate you)

2. cookies

 (this means i will be taking those v-day cookies i just bought to work tomorrow)

3. doughnuts - i really don't have them that often but i know there will be a huge box of them waiting for me tomorrow morning at work. i can always smell them when i walk by. that's probably a bad sign. tomorrow i will be strong!

4. limit my chocolate intake to twice a week (kind of cheating, i know....but at least its something!)
 

these stinking oreo balls were amazing

 and cake balls. maybe i just like saying balls. but they were amazing too. 

 so...here we go!!!!!  anyone giving something up until easter?