fallen leaves

oh my. time. life. how things change and stay the same. the cold air and fallen leaves are reminding me of where i was last year at this time. in another city, with another job, another partner, another life. i was moving forward and could feel the current changing, just couldn't see around the bend yet. i had no idea i would land here. i hadn't even imagined being in hair school, waiting tables on the weekend, reserving my photography for myself, or planning a family.
i look back now, remembering my apartment in Stillwater, the separation and change from the life i had been living for seven years. a new start. and starting with such shakiness. the fears, the tears, all the things i held on to, they flood back with this fall air. the crappy bar i would hang out at just to be near someone. the drives i would take, the music i was finding solace in. i remember these suddenly and then just as quickly feel how it all has passed.  like fallen leaves, these emotional memories, they're no longer attached to your soul. soon enough they'll be swept away in the wind, recycled by the earth into something usable.

i love this season for so many reasons, and this is just another one. here's to change, growth, renewal!