the years

    Fall semester time again! The weather is getting closer to perfection (slowly). And there’s that smell in the air each morning when I’m on my way to work. To me it’s the smell of love, school, new beginnings. It was 10 years ago that I came to college. TEN YEARS AGO!?!?!!!!!!!! whoa.
    I was by myself, save my high school boyfriend that came to school here too but somehow remained mostly separate from me in my freshman experience. I met by best friend Cat over a pee cup…drinking water until we had to pee bad enough to overcome our modesty (since NCAA Division I required everyone to be watched while urinating for drug tests).
    I had my teammates, practice twice a day, classes to attend, church on Sunday, and my heart to discover. I became myself away from my family and high school friends, away from my high school boyfriend and the expectations that followed me for 18 years until this point. I could be who I wanted to be, go where I wanted, and do what I wished (as long as it didn’t interfere with training of course). It was an invigorating era of possibilities.
    Even though its been ten years I feel that I’m there again. At least in my mind. This time there’s no school, no cross country team, no scholarship to pay for life. But I do have friends – long term soul friends that know me and will be with me forever. I’m closer to my family. I’m closer to myself and I know who I am. I know what I want, and what I don’t. I know what I believe, and why. I’m still the same random, kooky girl with a violent streak and a romantic soul, but 10 years grown. Not quite as green, wiser (at least I hope), clearer and more confident. Perhaps a bit more jaded, but determined not to hide behind my walls. Ready for life, whatever it brings.